It's Chanel, Baby!

Perhaps you're like me and often glance in the mirror thinking, "Oh dear god, this cannot be how I look today!" And then you realize, yes, in fact, it is how you look every day. Thankfully, there's Chanel.

The retailer announced the recent opening of its Costa Mesa, Calif.-based Chanel Makeup Studio, which is located inside Bloomingdale's. It's the first of its kind in the U.S., but not in the world. Apparently Chanel believes that the international peeps deserve their delicious makeup far before we do, because 10 makeup studios already exist at in Moscow, Tokyo, Dubai, Istanbul, Barcelona and London. Shockingly, my feelings are hurt. I'm sure yours are too.

But, have no fear, Chanel makes up for the diss by offering European and Asian best-selling goods at the new studio that you can't find anywhere else, at least domestically. Of course this means we'll all have to book flights to Costa Mesa to take advantage, but hey, Chanel does what it can.

Since I'm not much of a make-up-a-holic (hence the tremendous mirror disappointment), I was more excited to learn about the sassy design of the in-store makeup studio at Bloomingdale's. It's only a 500-sq.-ft. space, but makes up for its smallness with slick, black-and-white decor (in the traditional, classy Bloomingdale's style) including black lacquered shelving to hold its magnificent quantities of makeup. Wait, isn't lacquer out? Probably not if Chanel is doing it. The lighting--one of my personal interests--is set-up specifically to accent both the makeup and those trying it on. Gotta love that! The aura of the studio is sleek, sophisticated and modern (think Gattaca, not The Jetsons), with a nice luxurious edge.

I'm assuming the point of the over-the-top design is to distract customers from the obscene prices and instead transport them into absolute opulence. Luxury can be an amazing aphrodisiac, after all. In addition, the in-store studio features four huge plasma screen televisions blaring Chanel commercials, featuring hotties Nicole Kidman and Keira Knightley. Two girls who obviously don't realize how good food actually tastes, but, I digress...To add to the contemporary feel, a ticker streams constantly, broadcasting upcoming studio events and other important makeup news.

Chanel and Bloomingdale's really know how to do it up right.
Stay tuned...I have a feeling this concept will be spreading to more U.S. locations.

Been to the Chanel Makeup Studio in Bloomindale's? Or think I'm ridiculous because their makeup IS outstanding? Do tell! We want to hear from you...

--Heather Strang

What's A Mother to Do?

This just in, and hot off the presses, charming, and ever so cute Todd Oldman will be designing a new line for the much beleaguered Old Navy. He will be installed as their new creative director, effective Oct. 1, 2007. I for one confess I have mixed feelings. I feel a little bit like Judy Garland in that old MGM trailer where she’s singing to Clark Gable; she croons, "Dear Mr. Gable, I am writing you to say… (cue Max Steiner orchestra and violins) You made me love you, I didn’t want to do it, and I didn’t want to do it." Old Navy? Todd, say it ain’t so.

Mr. Oldham fresh from his stint on "Top Design" is of course in august company, as Vera Wang is designing for Kohl’s (deep breath). Victor & Rolf, Stella McCartney and Karl Lagerfeld have invigorated sales at H&M (gulp). Even I, a retail snob, purchased a Lagerfeld black-and-white banded turtleneck at H&M. Okay, it made me look like a gay priest, and granted it shrunk after the first washing, and is now being worn by my next door neighbor’s Schnauzer “Schnapps” to great affect at the local dog park. Ralph Lauren is launching (not lunching) at J.C. Penney. Cynthia Rowley is at Avon? Denim iconoclasts Chip & Pepper are selling their signature style to Premium Jeans. English designer Alice Temperley can blow air kisses to Isaac Mizrahi from LaGuardia while heading off via taxi to see Mossimo and Michael Graves at Target. Madonna and J Lo are old timers compared to recent bandwagoners for Macy’s, like Martha Stewart, Tim Gunn and Kenneth Cole.  And now, if enough wasn’t enough, Sephora and Donna Karan have just announced that they are selling a “virtual” line to kid’s Web site phenomenon www.stardoll.com It’s just computer-generated pretend clothing, but for real money. Say what? That’s like trading your cow for magic beans. What’s going on? Designers everywhere are jumping ship.

It reminds me of that old commercial for breakfast cereal where this hungry kid isn’t getting enough vitamins and his frustrated mother exclaims, "What’s a mother to do?" Well, I’m not getting enough of my designer vitamins, so what’s a Diva to do?

Perhaps they forget a talented designer named Roy Halston (think hot pants, satin halter top gowns, disco, the '70s, and an embarrassing cameo on "The Love Boat," where your cruise director Julie, [Lauren Tewes] becomes a fashion model). Halston naively sold his name to J.C. Penney. (Listen up Ralph “Lipschitz” Lauren) The rest is, as they say, fashion history. Even Halston couldn’t get back into Studio 54 after that melee.

Perhaps some of our best designers are trying to beat the counterfeiters at their own game and are duping themselves. It’s understood. After all, there is Bud Light and Diet Pepsi, but it still doesn’t taste as good. Designing for department stores is not a recent innovation. In the '50s and '60s, the American consumer could purchase a Dior, Norell or Balenciaga at Orchbach’s or Bonwit Tellers, but let’s face facts; you could also purchase a covered wagon in those days, too. Still this fashion exodus is sort of a fashion lite concept--not as nice fabric, not as many stitches per inch, less detail and less design, but ultimately the same look, if not taste. Only your hairdresser will know for sure, and trust me he will. Once-exclusive designers of great repute have now co-opted themselves, the way that mainstream American teens has co-opted urban hip-hop culture, in an effort to "fit it," and to have "street cred,"-- yuck! Mainstreaming fashion may be laudable, but I wish designers would just sell last year’s line cheaper so that middle-class Americans could afford it.

Is it the worst thing in the world not to own an original, or to not be able to afford a designer label? Would I really want to buy an Armani suit at Sears? No. Would I want to purchase a Fendi handbag at Payless? No. Would anyone really want to pick up a Chanel at Chico’s? I hope not.

Here’s the real crime: there are so many great unknown designers, unfortunately their names will never see the light of day because Americans do not have the confidence, and cannot differentiate between great design and great designers. They can only rely on their ability to identify the names of a few great designers, which is sufficient to drive sales. Customers buy fashionable names, not fashionable clothing. American consumers buy brands or brand names. The truth…A rose by any other name….

A personal note to Todd: Todd dear, I will be heading to Old Navy to check you out, like Mr. Gable, I hope you will not disappoint me. Because "gimme, gimme, gimme, gimme what I cry for. You know you have the kind of clothing, I would die for, yes, you made me love you, yes…you."

--Ron Knoth, Guest Blogger

Subliminal Retailing?

Leave it to Switzerland to come up with a tech-savvy way to completely brainwash retail customers. Zurich-based Barix AG creates IP audio and recently developed a product specifically for New Balance retail stores called SneakerRadio--an in-store radio station featuring custom advertising. So, very soon, you'll walk into a New Balance retail store and have the privilege of listening to great music along with messaging that, according to SneakerRadio," has been proven to increase brand awareness and customer recall of important marketing messages and can help increase sales through the power of suggestion." This is subtlety known, of course, as brainwashing. Thanks so much Barix.

For retailers, Barix's form of in-store radio means less hassle, as everything is handled via the store's Internet connection. With a million and one things to do in retail anyway, this system is set-up to basically run itself, all while streaming in real time. Barix teamed up with StreamGuys to handle the content as the system's service provider. StreamGuys distributes the retailers' custom program over the Internet as Shoutcast streams, creating multiple streams from different servers. But, all retailers really need to know, is that this format makes the program extremely easy to use and implement.

One New Balance owner actually credits the messaging system with training employees and making the store seem more professional. Now, that really takes a lot off of a retailer's hands--the radio system can even carve the company branding right into the employees brains. Wow, that's incredibly wrong and frightening.

Honestly, the whole thing is creeping me out. Yes, good audio is critical. I can't tell you how many times I've walked out of a Ross or Albertsons with some god-awful Celine Dion song pounding through my head. I mean, no one needs to hear the Power of Love again. Ever. So, I'm with Barix on the Internet-connection real-time streaming radio thing. Less hassle for retailers is also important. It's the custom messaging that gets me. Aren't consumers already deluged with endless amounts of advertising? Isn't in-store advertising a little bit overplayed already? Fred Meyer tells me constantly what their specials are as I cart my way through the store. By the end of my shopping experience, I'm ready to beat that lady with the computer generated voice over the head with a stick. But maybe that's just me.

I'm curious to see what the future holds for SneakerRadio and others like it. From now on, though, I'll have to make sure I don't walk out of New Balance with 20 bags looking like a zombie...

Do you have Internet-streaming radio playing in your store? Or do you have an unbelievably horrible song stuck in your head from retail radio (i.e., anything by the Bee Gees or Michael Bolton)? Let us know!

--Heather Strang

Maternity Matrimony

Proving that wherever there's a market, there's a retailer willing to cater to it, I present you with maternity bridal gowns. Yep, you read me right, we're talking about bridal gowns for pregnant women. Retailers A Pea in the Pod and Mimi Maternity recently announced their line of wedding dresses for expectant mothers. Apparently, it's quite the trend and in order to serve this growing demographic, the two retailers have decided to cash in. Not that I can blame them.

But, really, women want to get married while pregnant? That just seems uncomfortable and frankly, not very much fun. A pregnant wedding means you don't get to enjoy any of the good parts of the wedding, well except for cake, in which case, I would be all over that "I'm eating for two" thing. But, there would be no champagne toasts or staying up all night dancing.

Looks like I don't know what I'm talking about (and it wouldn't be the first time), because Rebecca Mattias, president and creative director of A Pea in the Pod, Mimi Maternity and Motherhood Maternity says that celebrities are getting married while pregnant all of the time. Seriously? I can't think of one. Mattias states that celebs have made saying "I do" while pregnant a trend and so now regular gals are finally feeling comfortable to do the same.

I have to wonder, is this actually true? Or have us normal women been getting married with child for a long time now and celebs doing it has simply made it socially acceptable, and therefore marketable? In any event, there's no point in questioning it. If celebrities are doing it, then by all means, let's find a way to make some money off of it. In our celeb-obsessed culture--trust me, I know what I'm talking about, I watch E! in absolutely disgusting quantities--following what the cool kids are doing is practically a national past time. Retailers are merely giving people what they want. And no one can hate on that.

According to maternity retailers, 2.8 million women are expecting every year. That's A LOT of babies. More importantly, that's a lot of hormonal women with cash to burn and bodies to clothe. And surprisingly, the wedding dresses are adorable. No tents or moo-moos for these p.g. ladies. Elegant lace trim, dainty designs and ivory colors adorn these gowns. Almost makes you want to get married when you're pregnant...

So, I've got to know, what do you all think about this? I love it when retailers find a niche market and this is the best example I've ever come across!  If you're a retailer with a maternity bridal line, please send us a link to your gowns. As a girl, I love to look at wedding dresses--even if they are for pregnant women.

--Heather Strang

When Retailers Get It Right

I love it when retailers get it right. I love to see the “little guy,” the proverbial “underdog,” succeed. I guess I relate, and that’s a story I would like to tell today.

“Caravan,” a now successful store (actually two stores with a third opening shortly), was founded in 2005. Without a farthing to her name, let alone a down payment for a NY City store rental, and simply no capitol to stock a store, enterprising owner Claudine Gumbel simply operated her business out of a RV. That's right, a recreational vehicle. Her RV was loaded up will all sorts of designer goodies, and parked randomly throughout the city. In short, the store came to you. It promised exclusivity, a valuable commodity in New York, elsewhere too I imagine. The Caravan attracted young women who wanted to shop for a sweet little dress, or silky blouse on their lunch hours with the other girls in the office, but didn’t know where to go, let alone have time to shop during lunch. Shopping is, after all, practically a form of dieting these days. The Caravan became a cause celeb; a social destination; a special “girl’s only” treat during the grueling work week.

Owner Gumbel learned quickly what her customers wanted, and with her already sharp fashion sense, collected site-specific garments based on her customer’s demographics. Gumbel is a hard working, astute businessperson--a waif of a girl, petite, soft-spoken, charming and delectably delicious to look at. She could be Carrie Bradshaw’s doppelganger. Office parties were organized around the caravan’s arrival, sizes were called in advance with specific requests to the innovative Gumbel, who loaded up the truck accordingly. The Caravan was a success--often available for shopping parties, fundraising events and showers. Think of the brag factor around the water cooler, “Mercy, no I don’t have time to schlep to (you fill in the blank), my stylist is bringing me a few things to look at during my next coffee break. Do you want me to ask them to bring a few things for you?” Each week, Caravan’s Web site lists the neighborhoods the RV will be located, making each destination a special event, something special to share with your co-workers, something special to look forward to. It was an immediate and resounding success.

In the time it takes to parallel park in the city, Gumbel opened a store for those of us who aren’t accustomed to mobility. The store has a laid-back lounge feel, DJ booth and ample seating so that window shoppers and boyfriends in tow can rest and socialize. The store is available for private events. Why not hold your 27th birthday in a way cool store rather than your 5th floor studio walkup with rickety old folding chairs? Who knows, maybe your guests sans gift, can all chip in for something super special for you, and you can pick it out, change in the dressing room, and model it for them right there. You’ll be the belle of the ball. Not content with hiring commonly dull salespeople, the staff are really stylists in training, and are well versed in styling for the fashion challenged. It’s a brilliant strategic personnel maneuver! They enjoy dressing customers, and are happy to offer a second opinion. If you don’t see what you want, you need only to ask, the staff will do their best to get it. Gumbel applied her retail savvy and introduced men’s clothing into the mix. Now dreamy-eyed couples can shop together, or smart young women can help redress their sloppy, albeit cute, boyfriends in designer jeans and sexy knot tops to adorn their arms. Gumbel’s equally adorable husband Brian, no relation to the pompous newscaster, is a public relations entrepreneur and one of NY’s best dressed ones at that, thanks to his clever wife. It pays to advertise.

Caravan has some of the hottest, trendiest clothes in all of Manhattan. It’s mostly designer, and provides one of the most complimentary and eclectic mixes of clothing in the city. In this global economy, where fashion immigrates from all over the world, it’s not unusual to find key pieces of clothing from England, Sweden, France, Canada, Thailand, Spain, Denmark, Africa, Brazil, Norway, and even the good old USA. After all, NY is the nation’s melting pot. The store celebrates the world of fashion, and the world is larger than most retailers let on. If Caravan has it, it's smart.

Recently Caravan hosted a standing-room-only fashion show presentation at The Manhattan Pavilion for those of us not invited to the tent shows in Bryant Park (and there are many) for Fashion Week. A stroke of brilliance, as we could all boast to our colleagues that we were off to a fashion show. Love it! Customers were lined up half way down 19th Street. The complicated show went off without a hitch. Most interesting to note was that none of the clothing was over-priced, pretentious, phony-baloney couture. It was all ready-to-wear, aka street fashion. The collections held together seamlessly, demonstrating that everyone can be fashionable, and stay on budget. Models were not of the severe, pouty, constipated types one is accustomed to—many, in fact, proffering smiles that belied their enjoyment. Smiling at a fashion show? How scandalous. The audience ate it up! It was absolutely entrancing. Furthermore, love was in the air, as several ensembles were sent down the catwalk on models strolling hand in hand, just like real life. How cute is that? The vibe was perfect! Best of all, guests could place their orders right after the show. No need to bother with setting up appointments, fittings, the months-long wait for the couturier to produce or waiting for it to finally make its way to a major department store. It’s all available. Versatile designers like Vivienne Westwood, J. Lindeberg, H. Fredriksson and Fred Perry with their distinctive fashion vocabulary were well integrated into the show with designers like Social Atelier, Keep A Child Alive and Moods, who are comparatively slang designers, providing a hip, urbane and harmonious mix of well established, and the avant garde.

If you are not in the Metropolitan area and still want to shop, the caravan may not be traveling to your municipality, but you can shop from their Web site www.shopcaravan.com. For you other retailers who complain about the state of the economy, boo-hoo-hoo, and how the “big guys” are squeezing them out, boo-hoo-hoo, who wait for customers to come to them, or who seldom offer an event to lure customers in, take note. Shopping is fun, shopping is a form of entertainment. Caravan gets it!

--Ron Knoth, Guest Blogger

Photo: By Kim Wiseley

Carbon Emissions are the New Retail Enemy

Everybody's doing it. Literally. Retailers the world over are finally giving consumers what they want--environmentally friendly practices. From Wal-Mart to Cole Haan, eco-conscious store operations, products and services are popping up everywhere there's an "open" sign. Safeway kicked things off in the grocery sector by adding 20 percent biodiesel fuel to their trucks from domestically manufactured virgin soybean oil. I knew that stuff had to be good for something. Wal-Mart has a fleet of hybrid vehicles for light-duty use and followed in Safeway's tracks by making 7,200 of its semi tractor-trailer trucks 15 percent more fuel efficient, with plans to meet a target of 25 percent efficiency.

Next, fashion retailers got savvy with reusable tote bags. I still believe that Trader Joe's started the trend with their Hawaiian vinyl bags, but regardless of who made it happen, major department stores are following suit. Cole Haan recently announced plans to release a100% cotton canvas bag --trimmed in chrome-free vegetable leather no less--and decked out in company colors. It also features their logo, so of course, they're encouraging consumers to use the stylish bags all over town. But hey, who cares, if it keeps us from wasting disposable plastic/paper bags and further polluting our environment? Even I can get behind shameless marketing if it has a positive environmental impact.

The eco-friendly attitude isn't just happening in the United States; U.K. retailer Marks & Spencer announced the opening of "eco-stores" in Scotland. The new stores emit 95 percent LESS carbon dioxide and utilize incredible technology like roof mounted sun pipes and wind catchers, as well as generating hot water through heat from their refrigeration plant. Absolute genius! The retailer has even released statements that say it plans to be carbon neutral by 2012. Five years ago, I'm not sure I (or the rest of the world) would have any idea what that meant, but now I know it's a big deal. And retailers are a part of the change.

Speaking of carbon dioxide emissions, Office Depot reduced its emissions by 10 percent. Now, while that may not seem like a lot initially, imagine if every retailer did this. Even more impressive, Office Depot's total reach increased by 1.7 million sq. ft., yet it was still able to dramatically reduce its emissions. The company also employs an, "Environmental Strategy Advisor," who in a recent statement said that Office Depot's overall plan is becoming more and more about buying green, being green and selling green. And this is Office Depot we're talking about, not some natural foods retailer. How's that for progress?!

Retailers are not only making a difference in the environment, they're making a difference in the way we do business. It's all pretty inspiring. Makes me want to buy some of those carbon offset certificates...how about you? 

Are you a retailer employing eco-conscious tactics or do you know a retailer that's creating environmental change? If so, leave us a comment--we'd love to know about more rockin' retailers.

--Heather Strang

Photo: The Apple store on Chicago's Magnificent Mile features a green roof system from GreenGrid.

Is a Chinese Grinch Going to Steal Christmas?

If you have gone shopping for toys lately, no doubt you have experienced the chaos--and empty shelves--currently ruling in many toy stores. Toy recalls, driven by unsafe, foreign manufacturing processes--at least 80 percent of the toys sold in the United States are made in China--have rendered millions of toys worthless and unsellable. Problems range from toxic lead paint to small magnets that come unattached and can be accidentally ingested.

In this country, big names, including Fisher-Price, Mattel and even Barbie are involved. Want to buy your little girl a Barbie Kitty condo for Christmas, or your boy a train set? Forget about it. And just in case you thought that this was a new situation, no way. Take a hard look at all those toys you have bought for kids over the past years [they have almost all been imported from China for more than a decade]. Do you really think the Chinese were using higher standards of safety in the past--and then went back to being unsafe? Those toys have been a danger all along, but the situation has only recently come to light. One report tells of a mother who collected up all her kids’ toys and put them in a closet until she could figure out how to determine if they were safe--or how to return them. Her kids are playing with rubber balls and knitting yarn--and the family dog.

The Chinese say they are taking steps to correct things, but parents are going to need a lot of reassurance when shopping this holiday season. Diva says look for wooden, all-natural toys and handcrafted and vintage items that were made in the United States in days long past--they can be a lot of fun [and collectibles too]. Or better yet, how about getting your kids an old-fashioned [but safe] book and reading it to them--“How The Grinch Stole Christmas.”

Retailers are working with the Chinese and will get the situation under control, but it will take time. The Chinese say that American firms caused the problem by always wanting things "cheaper and cheaper" [they say lead paint costs much less]. But all this year’s Christmas toy orders, which were placed many months ago, have already on ships sailing from China--and a Chinese Grinch is sitting on one of those smokestacks, threatening to steal Christmas--from retailers and kids.

--Diva

For the Green Man

While women across the country get ready to stampede stores in search of the hottest fall fashions, men also have something to look forward to--especially if they are concerned about the environment: green drawers. Drawers as in underwear that is, made of eco-friendly bamboo.

Now bamboo is not something you think of as being comfy or huggable or sexy, but Donna Karan, designer for DKNY, is launching an underwear collection for men that is made of 70 percent bamboo and 30 percent cotton. The waistbands of the briefs will have a green stripe woven in for identification, and the company claims that these male intimates are antibacterial, deodorizing, breathable and have moisture-wicking properties. The collection will be featured at Bloomingdale’s, Macy’s and DKNY stores and will range in price from $28 to $34 for undershirts and from $19.50 to $34 for bottoms.

Diva says, forget those dreadful Valentine’s Day and Holiday novelty undershorts with hearts and Santas, and buy your man bamboo briefs--so he can be green to the core.

--Diva

Macy's at the Emmy's

Think the Emmy's--airing Sept.16th, 8 p.m. on FOX--are all about checking out who's wearing and winning what? Wrong. Pay closer attention and you'll notice that the Emmy's are actually an ideal opportunity for retailers to captivate their market. At least, that's Macy's plan.

The retailer is pulling out all the stops to entice everyone and anyone really, to increase their shopping at Macy's. The 2005 purchase of May Co. produced a backfire that has left the retailer with less-than-glistening sales results. Fortunately, Macy's has plenty of fire power behind the Emmy launch of their new campaign. That's right, they went where all retailers go when things look dismal--celebrity land. And they snagged some good ones--Donald Trump, P.Diddy, Usher, Martha Stewart and Jessica Simpson. Ads will run throughout the fall in hopes to raise Macy's recent listless sales. I'm actually excited to see what Macy's put together, and it outta be good with an alleged $100 million spent on the celeb-driven campaign.

Word is, the ads make fun of celebrities (do we love anything more?! I sure don't!) showcasing Trump blow-drying his "hair" and Jessica Simpson struggling to open a Macy's door. Nice. So far, I'm in. Usher will be featured as his usual arrogant self bragging about his two new fragrances--Usher for Women and Usher for Men. Wow, what incredibly strategic branding, Usher. Lame-o. The funny part is he's bragging to Martha Stewart as she obsessively fiddles with her 2,000+ products at Macy's. From the outset, it seems the $100 million may have been well worth it. Even if I have to see the overexposed Usher...yet again.

Now, I'm not sure I'll shop at Macy's after laughing hilariously at their celeb focused ads, because frankly, I miss my Meier & Frank (now Macy's). But, it may help shift my perception. In an ever changing retail market, perception is everything. Right now, Macy's is stuck between a rock and a hard place--middle class shoppers in love with Target's discount prices, and high-end shoppers languishing in Nordstrom and Saks land.

But, Macy's has had success with celeb-driven marketing in the past. Their sponsorship of Bravo's Project Runway turned out to be an enormous success, with the show's "Guide to Style" filmed on location at various Macy's stores. As that show continues to rise, Macy's involvement also does--bringing a completely different shopper into its stores.

So, while the verdict is still out--obviously, since the campaign hasn't aired yet--the results are bound to be interesting. The campaign does carry the distinct possibility of impacting fourth-quarter sales results. If anything, I know I'll be paying more than the usual snide comment attention to the Emmy's. (i.e., Did Ellen Pompeo lose yet another 10 pounds? Eat something, girl!) It really is all about the commercials anyway, isn't it? Thanks Macy's for making the Emmy's interesting again!

Think Macy's can drive more in-store traffic with a star-studded fall ad campaign? It might happen; people...let me know what you think.

--Heather Strang

 

Wal-Mart Opens on Broadway (Well Sort Of)

Well, Diva is planning her next trip to New York, and top of the to-do-list is the new musical “Walmartopia.” It’s playing at the Minetta Lane Theater in Greenwich Village [yes, that's actually off Broadway]. It seems Wal-Mart has found the New York location they have been looking for [or maybe not, as this production obviously does not have the retail giant’s blessings].  And no, this play is not a celebration of retail. It is described as a time-traveling musical and a hard-hitting satire--set in the future world of 2037, ruled by Wal-Mart--with a power-to-the-worker message. One reviewer calls it a “futuristic Norma Rae.” Yes, the little guy (actually gal) wins in the end. Want a ticket? Call 212-307-4100. Take opera glasses and a Wal-Mart smiley-face button! And, you knew it--the play opened on Labor Day. Diva can’t vouch for how long it will last--so go soon.

--Diva

Going Once, Going Twice

When I’m feeling dark about the mouth or merely Romanesque, I usually I just turn on Jerry Springer to see battling hillbillies duke it out over some inane familial nonsense.  As you know, the Jerry Springer show is a modern day version of the bickering Hatfields and McCoys. “Hands off; that’s my wife, that’s my baby, that’s my man, I saw him first.” The trailer trashy foibles seem to elevate my mood. I think, there but for the grace of God go thee. Besides, who has time to read Oedipus?

Of late, however, I need only to turn to the business pages of The Wall Street Journal and The New York Times to read about today’s version of the Hatfields and the McCoys, Istithmar World, which is a private-equity firm based in Dubai, and Fast Retailing from Japan, and their bidding war for Barneys New York, which is owned by Jones Apparel Group. They could put Jerry to shame.

For you non-Barneys shoppers who may not be clued in, here is a synopsis of Barneys history. Barneys was opened by Barney Pressman in 1923, a fist generation Jewish émigré. Barney, clearly not a romantic, hocked his wife’s wedding ring to open his first store (note to self: have wedding ring appraised). Pressman was equally well known for scouring the obituaries for recently deceased executives and celebrities, where upon he would offer their widows ten cents on the dollar for their husband’s old suits. Barneys was sort of a luxury version of “Second Hand Rose.” An early attempt of green retailing: recycle, reuse and reduce. Flash forward to the present, Barneys is best known for its Creative Director Simon Doonan’s extraordinary Christmas windows, which are scandalous, naughty and always the talk of the town. He is retail’s gold standard for challenging the status quo of visual. Barneys is often lampooned in TV shows like “Seinfeld” and “Will and Grace” that have exposed its pretentious airs. Yet Barneys is lovingly homaged in shows like “Sex and The City” and Sophie Kinsella’s “Shopaholic” series. Read “Breakfast at Fred’s.” Barneys is known for its clever and artistic visuals like the way Barneys Co-Op paints all its display forms in a sweet fairy tale blue which is just magical, and oh so annoying.

Long story short, Barneys was sold about 4 years ago for $400 million, which at the time seemed astronomical, especially as the renowned retailer had filed for Chapter 11 bankruptcy in 1996. Istithmar was scampering about town on a buying spree, and offered $825 million for Barneys, don’t you just love it? (I cannot afford to pick up that cute one button jacket at Co-Op, but I digress.) Everyone agreed it was a very generous offer, especially for tourists who are usually content with an "I Heart NY" t-shirt, or Empire State Building snow globe. That is until Fast Retailing upped the ante with a bid of $900 million. As the deal with Dubai was all but inked, Barneys would have had to pay $40 million to Dubai to get out of the deal. All things considered, Fast Retailing’s offer more than made up for that loss. It seemed like a done deal. Ah ha! But we now live in an eBay culture, where fierce rivalries can drive a $5 Popeye Pez dispenser up to $500 in little more than a week’s time. In a surprise counter offer, Istithmar offered a whopping $942 million for Barneys, $117 million more than their original offer. I guess they were holding out. That was it, basta! A done deal, insiders thought, but Fast Retailing needed to save face, and now came up with $950 million--$25 million more than their original offer. The board of directors of Jones Apparel practically wet their pants. I wonder what would have happened if Barneys went on eBay?

Political relations between Dubai and Japan were said to have been seriously hampered, and all over a few pieces of clothing. Don’t you just love the fashion industry? It’s doubtful that they were seriously contemplating going to war, but you never know. We never did find those weapons of mass destruction. The proverbial ball was, as they say, in Dubai’s court. One might wonder why they just didn’t have a slap fest like they do on the Jerry Springer show. It seemed quite possible that when all is said and done, Barneys might sell for close to a billion dollars.

Fast Retailing, may be not so fast—they announced that they were backing off, and Barneys employees can now proudly boast that they are working for the Arab Emirate Republic. TA DA! Oil trumps again!!! Barney Pressman is rolling over in his grave. Barneys consists of just five flagship stores, two smaller stores, three stores in Japan and 14 (discount) stores called “Co-Op” and a smattering of outlets. Plans for several new stores are slated for the upcoming year. Take heart, Fast Retailing, who already owns a little subsidiary called Uniqlo, may have the last word—it plans to break the one trillion (that’s trillion, which I’m told is way more than a billion) yen mark by 2010. It plans to snap up other U.S. retailers, preferably those in the luxury end of the market place. Anyone for sale?

Why is this bidding war pertinent? Well it’s symbolic of what is right and wrong in the world of retail. Stores were once run to buy and sell merchandise, now they’re just bought outright, bricks and mortar. Stores were developed to become unique institutions, now they’re developed to poise them for potential resale. Stores were part of the community, not just a feather in someone else’s investment portfolio. Stores were best when they were idiosyncratic, which we customers loved. Stores today are for the most part reduced to just a brand name or recognizable logo, or worse yet, a familiar TV commercial, which is infinitely more interesting than the actual store. I love Target advertising, but their stores still merchandises off of gondolas. The last time I saw a gondola was at Korvettes. Yipes! I hope that Barneys proves me wrong, sale or no sale. Maybe some day I’ll be able to buy that cute one button jacket.

--Ron Knoth, Guest Blogger

What Goes Up Must Come Down (Hems That Is--and Maybe the Economy Too)

Is there a relationship between plunging stocks and plunging hemlines? Conventional wisdom in retail says that when economies are heating up hems are short; when times are lean, hems fall. That was true in the roaring '20s, with beaded vamp dresses that caressed the thighs. Hems were long in the war-era '40s and well into the '50s. Then, in the '60s, when Twiggy ruled with her mad, Mod clothes, it was--the shorter the better. The recession of the '70s brought an abrupt tumble to hems, introducing the Maxi, which grazed ankles, and that style was around until the economy recovered late-decade. Since then, hems have been a little more sporadic--ranging up and down, sometimes on a seasonal basis, or depending on a particular designer's whim [a lot of women have fled to pants to avoid the hem indecision]. The Mini, just re-introduced last season, barely got off of the ground [meaning many customers haven't even had time to buy one yet], before this fall's big fashion news--long is the new short.

According to The Wall Street Journal and other sources reporting on the current fashion week in New York, we'll be wearing long, lean skirts this spring. Badgley Mischka, Bill Blass, Michale Kors and Donna Karan are some of the designers said to be sporting the new look [new because long has not been around as a dominant style for a decade or more]. Fashion is also moving into a more grown-up, lady-like attitude, with more elegance and sophistication.

Shoppers should be aware that fashions with longer profiles require more fabric, and this adds to costs. Some fashion experts say this could result in price increases of around 20 percent. But the silhouette change is expected to ramp up sales of women's apparel by around 4.5 percent this year, which could give fashion retailers a shot in the arm.

Designers claim, of course, that their choices of hem lengths depend on their creative moods and whims--up, down, whatever. They claim total creative freedom and disclaim any influence from economic or other non-aesthetic factors. [Diva suspects that we are all subject to incoming impressions from all aspects of the economy and culture we live in, whether we realize it or not--we all react, even if sometimes subconsciously.] And it's really all up to the customer. In the WSJ article, Carolina Herrera said, "Designers do not dictate length anymore, as they once did." Still, most women want to be in style--they do follow fashion trends, at least for dressier functions.

So is the economy going down along with fashionable hemlines? The meltdown in the housing and credit markets certainly has everyone worried. But we'll have to wait and see--October, the dreaded, historically witchy stock market month--may tell the tale.

Or is it a reaction to those higher home heating energy bills? Maybe covering up more of our bodies will keep us warmer this winter [Diva's air conditioning bill has been running between $300 and $400 a month this summer, the highest ever. Can't wait for winter heating bills]. Maybe a long [warm] skirt or coat doesn't sound so bad.

--Diva

Photo: Long dresses like this one from Badgley Mischka's Fall 2007 couture collection are expected to be in this spring.

Will Fashion Retailers Let MySpace Play?

MySpace wants to play. It's gotten a little bored with merely connecting old high school friends, promoting bands and enabling against-god's-will love connections. Now, MySpace wants to take on fashion. In late August, the social networking leader launched its Fashion Community (and hey, it's already got 52,000+ friends, so it must be good). Visitors can watch videos of fashion shows and photo shoots, get the latest celeb fashion news and catch ads for the fashion-savvy.

Hello retailers! Could MySpace be making this any easier for you? If you're a fashion-focused retailer, create a profile (I know I've advised you on this before--but I'm serious this time!) and add yourself as a Fashion friend. Then buy some ad space. Got a photo shoot or some other fantastically interesting fashion piece? Submit! The MySpace fashion community is HOT, HOT, HOT. It's a great place to connect with the demographic that will go without food for a month just for clothes. This is fashion, baby!

The MySpace Fashion community also includes forums, with topics ranging from "Baggy pants for girls" to "Who cares what size you are?" Okay, maybe not earth-shattering topics, but still a great opportunity to inform the social networking community about the baggy pants for ladies that your store carries and the fact that you're committed to offering clothes with sizes for real women. The beauty of this community is the ability for everyone in the fashion industry--retailers included--to connect with their audience in a very real way. Imagine the opportunity to find out exactly what your target market wants and have "conversations" with them about it. How very 2007 is that?!

Now, obviously, MySpace isn't the first to come up with this fabulous marketing ploy; Iqons and WhoWhatWearDaily have been doing the same thing for some time. However, with 115 million unique visitors a month, MySpace has a definite edge. And that's why both online communities partnered with MySpace, furthering the intensity and reach of this social networking fashion opportunity.

MySpace Fashion will officially launch this week, during New York's Fashion Week, Sept. 5-12, 2007. How very appropriate! So, retailers--what do you say? Jumping on board? I say, forget about the radio (yawn!) advertising and start doing some serious social networking. The payoffs are sure to be HUGE.

Already a MySpace Fashion friend? Let us know if it's all its cracked up to be.

--Heather Strang

Apple Forgot: Cool Is Not a Commodity

Diva was not one of those sweaty people standing in long lines, waiting to buy an iPhone some time back [Diva wrote a blog about the iPhone earlier, when it first hit the market], and now she is doubly glad she wasn’t. The new version of the iPhone, introduced only a short time after the first one, is greatly improved and--way cheaper [by about $200].  So now Diva doesn’t have to join the ranks of all those previous buyers who are e-mailing Steve Jobs and ranting about their displeasure. R-I-P off: that’s what most early buyers think, and the $100 credit toward more Apple merchandise, now being offered as a peace offering to those who bought early, is unlikely to smooth all the ruffled feathers [but hey, it's a start].

Perhaps lagging iPhone purchases prompted the company to drastically lower the price, hoping to jump-start pre-season  holiday shopping. But what Apple forgot was that what they are really selling is a brand promise--to bestow ultimate technological one-ups-man-ship and a huge dose of personal cool--on those who buy its products. Apple’s customers are buying cool, and this cool communicates that they are hip and smart and technology aware. By its recent actions, Apple is sending the message that its customers are not cool; they are stupid [they were duped into paying way more than they had to, weren’t they? And being a test market for technology that obviously didn't yet have all the kinks worked out]. And if something is really cool and hip and desirable, there should be no need to mark it down [well maybe closer to Christmas, that would be nice]. If you have to do a markdown to get people to buy it, then the item wasn’t really cool to begin with. There are no halfway measures in regards to cool [it either is cool or it isn’t]. Cool is not a commodity.

In this case, Apple failed to deliver on its brand promise, and this was a big mistake--one that disappointed thousands of hard-core, dedicated fans. Maybe some Apple merchant decided that dropping the price was needed to create a sales boost before year-end to help the balance sheet [or maybe Apple just priced the item too high to begin with]. But now, all that brand loyalty has to be rebuilt--one customer at a time.

--Diva

Lower Prices? How DARE You?!!

The Apple iPhone has once again made headlines. Not for the long lines of customers sleeping outside of Apple and AT&T stores anxiously awaiting to hold the revered product in their hands. Not for lengthy CNN reports complaining of 300-page phone bills that detail every action of the phone's existence. But for...are you ready?...lowering its price. Steve Jobs casually dropped the $599 iPhone's retail price by $200 yesterday, sparking instant kickback from owners whose backs are still sore from sleeping on concrete. When the PlayStation 3 dropped its price a few months ago...it's loyal owners had at least won a few titles on NCAA football already. Electronics message boards are exploding with loyal customers claiming they've been "slapped across the face," and Apple will surely have quite a price to pay to get those customers back to their happy place.

Under Apple's current return policy, customers who purchased the iPhone within the last 14 days are eligible for a reimbursement of the price differential, but that doesn't help the 500,000 customers who bought their iPhones the weekend of its debut. And at full price.

Apple's goal of selling 10 million iPhones by the end of 2008 now sounds a little more realistic, however, considering the other sect of consumers who had held off purchasing the product due to its lofty pricetag. The debut of the new iPod touch from Apple is the culprit behind the price reduction. The iPod Touch incorporates the touchscreen user interface from Apple's iPhone, but will also feature WiFi wireless networking capabilities and a full Safari browser. Also, the 8-GB iPod touch will cost $329, with a 16-GB model running at $449. Coming to a store near you at the end of September. Prepare for more i-Mania.

--Alison Embrey Medina

Photo: Courtesy of Apple

We Know It When We See It

Apparently, offensive or annoying advertising alienates consumers...(Really? No duh.) In any case, according to a national survey commissioned by Streetblimps Inc.--a company that implements outdoor and alternative marketing campaigns--86 percent of Americans said that when advertising offends or annoys them, they are less likely to buy the product.

It seems pretty obvious to me that you don't want to offend (or even annoy) your potential customers. So why would a company even consider this kind of advertising? Well think of this: 70 percent of survey respondents said they are more likely to remember irritating ads. So is it better to be memorable or to play it safe?

Doug Frantin, founder of Streetblimps, says that there's a fine line between being memorable and going too far. "When it comes to deciding what's offensive, we know it when we see it," he says. Although what's considered offensive/annoying may vary based on demographics, the survey found the decision not to buy the product was universal. Age, income, ethnicity and location didn't affect the responses. Only 11 percent of respondents said they were more likely to buy the product when the advertising annoyed or offended them.

So I want to know, why does it have to be offensive/annoying to be memorable? Plenty of ads are memorable without the irritation--think of the AT&T/Cingular ads that feature different conversations ruined by dropped calls. These are pretty hilarious--therefore memorable. (If you don't know what I'm talking about then you are seriously out of the loop.) Now compare these ads to the Geico.com commercials with the cavemen. Some people find those funny, but personally, I cannot stand them. I think they are completely stupid and abrasive--but I do remember them...just not for the right reason. However, just because I find AT&T ads funny/memorable does not mean I'm going to use their services. In fact, check out what this blog had to say about the campaign:

"Following a Better Business Bureau investigation into the 'fewest dropped calls' ad campaign and a protracted legal fight with Sprint over the issue, AT&T is reportedly dropping its claim, according to an employee. Turns out, the assertion was never really true, and was based on only a small part of a larger Telephia report. As a whole, the report notes that AT&T Wireless did not have the most reliable network in places like New York, Chicago, Houston and Los Angeles, according to Broadband Reports. Recent studies from Consumer Reports and JD Power mirror these findings, and have placed Cingular/AT&T at or near the the bottom of their rankings for reliability and satisfaction. An AT&T spokesman says that dropping the 'fewest dropped calls' language is just part of an overall shift to a new message: 'More bars in more places.'"

But I digress...Anyhow, this goes back to the age-old question: is there such thing as bad publicity? Well if you're familiar with the Retail Design Diva, you already know my answer--yes, there most definitely is. Being offensive is easy. Why not up the creativity and snag us with that?

--Jessie Bove

Counting Calories: Bad Math

Are you overweight? Are your clothes a bit too snug these days? If so, you have plenty of company. Americans are gaining weight like never before, and the ranks of the obese are rapidly growing. Diva wants to know what food retailers are doing to help?

Well, many of them have ditched trans fats, and some have taken super-size items off their menus. We are seeing more salads--and even apple sections and carrot sticks. But it’s up to customers to educate themselves about their food. There is a lot of talk about green values and healthy living these days. Organic [healthier] food is in. Fresher, local food [which takes less energy to transport] is also increasing in popularity. But, it’s still about the calories--stupid! And some consumers are obviously not good with the math.

An article in The New York Times told of a study in which researchers interviewed people who had just dined at a McDonald’s or a Subway restaurant. For a typical 911-calorie meal in each restaurant, at Subway, consumers thought they had eaten about 205 calories less than diners at McDonald’s. Diners at McDonald’s thought they had eaten 764 calories. At Subway, they thought they had eaten 559 calories. [In fact, a Subway B.M.T. sandwich has 300 more calories than a McDonald’s Big Mac.] In the study, college students eating at Subway were more likely to upgrade to a larger drink and to add a cookie or two to their tab, than diners at McDonald’s, thus canceling out any real calorie savings. Proving once again, that perception is in the eye of the beholder. But in this case, perception is not reality, because those pounds will add up, whether people are aware of consuming them.

--Diva

The Hottest Ticket

The fall fashion issues of Vogue, Harpers and Elle are littering the newsstands; the store windows at Bloomingdale’s and Saks are arrayed in autumnal finery, and the tents went up last week in Bryant Park ushering in the official fall fashion season in New York. This seminal fashion event will be the last of its kind, at least in this venue. The scope and popularity of the event has simply outgrown the physical size of the space (approximately one city block). This comes concurrent with a significant shift in cultural values, which also helped spell an end to this fashion show, as we know it. Bryant Park is a public space, and the fashion shows are private events--invitation only. It is easier to garner a Papal indulgence than a ticket to any of the shows.

The public has voiced its consternation with event promoters and city administrators asking if this is the best use of public property, questioning its fairness and why the event helps supports a two-tiered system of the haves versus the have-nots. The event by and large, tends to attract anorexic movie stars, formerly incarcerated debutants, over-coiffed and under-dressed celebrities; the world’s elite and infamous in droves. The people we love to hate. Even the press and paparazzi are not excluded; they are in fact given ample room to spread out their wares, but not so for Jane Doe, she will need to walk on the other side of the street. The benefit to the Bryant Park location is that it’s an insulated spot. The fashion show attracts millions of dollars of business to NY, but ultimately leaves a bad taste in the public’s mouth. It is not a democratic event, but fashion is not meant to be democratic. Bryant Park with its graceful sycamore trees, marble fountain and stately green lawn is a picture perfect backdrop set against the back façade of the main branch of New York’s Beau Arts Public Library. New Yorkers and attendees to the show are robbed of that beauty for several weeks, and will need to settle for the long legged beauties strutting down the catwalk in Marc Jacobs, Betsy Johnson, Lanvin and Chanel.

It would seem to be a natural for the fashion shows to be in the Fashion District. Bryant Park is just outside of the traditional boundaries of the Fashion District, and is a tad bit closer to Times Square and Broadway, which in some regards may be more appropriate with its Disneyfied and Epcoted theatricality. The Fashion District would love to bring the event closer to its shores, which is a distant four or five blocks away. The Fashion District, which has seen better days, would love to be the recipient of the attention, and dollars, that the Bryant Park event promises. There appears, however, to be an unspoken fear that the limelight of the press might shed an unflattering light. The Fashion District due to recent rezoning laws, escalating rents, etc., has seen many of its sturdiest tenants make for the exodus to overseas operations. Granted, the Fashion District is a bit on the seedy side, but it always was. The Fashion District has what old garmentos would describe as “tooth,” an apt phrase that described fabric that is rough or a little bit chewed up. By all accounts, the Fashion District remains in a perpetual state of woe-be-gone days. The death toll is far from ringing; still this is a story of little interest to the general public let alone the fashion world.

I wonder, if Macy’s can manage to close off all of Fifth Avenue for The Thanksgiving Day Parade, why not turn Herald Square into an alternate site, and then open their 34th Street doors to their first floor, set up with a catwalk. They open their doors to a Flower Show each year. Why not turn Fashion (7th) Avenue into a parade route with stadium seating that traces the Fashion Hall Walk of Fame. Lets paint the street red, like a red carpet, for one week and reduce traffic in an effort to promote green thinking. Once up, why not repeat shows, one during the day for guests only, and another for the public later in the day. The Ladies Millinery Synagogue would be ideal to show hat collections. The fashion school at Parsons and the Museum at FIT (Fashion Institute of Technology) would be charming sites for smaller shows. The Javitz Center has a crystal palace perfect for hosting larger events. Or how about the glorious rooftop of 499 Fashion Avenue, which was the first modern manufacturing plant, built in 1921--it provided home for over 22,000 sewers in its hey-day. I say lets share the wealth with Lord & Taylor, Bergdorf’s, Bendel's and Barneys, Bloomingdale’s and Saks. Wouldn’t it be a hoot to see a show inside their stores, their windows paying homage to the world’s best fashion designers for a week, and their racks filled with their wares? Every store could do the same; Victoria’s secret could easily pack in the guys at lunchtime. H&M and Abercrombie & Fitch would have lines outside the doors if they’d launch a new design collection by Stella McCartney or Victor & Rolf. This week in NY could be for all people everywhere, instead of just a select few.  If I ruled the world, fashion would be democratic.

--Ron Knoth, Guest Blogger

Photo: Bryant Park

Happy Labor Day!

The Diva wishes everyone a safe and happy Labor Day! She will be back tomorrow with another tantalizing blog. Enjoy the holiday!